


pynk (as we all go insane)

by queenC_13



Category: Dead To Me (TV)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, F/F, Fluff and Smut, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Smut, it's... definitely the filthiest thing i've ever written, judy helps give jen a bath, obviously it escalates, so uhhhh enjoy???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:54:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26225266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenC_13/pseuds/queenC_13
Summary: Jen observes her for another moment and thinks about the signs that maybe just maybe Judy is feeling this too, before taking a deep breath and spitting out her next words: “Or you could stay.”
Relationships: Judy Hale/Jen Harding
Comments: 23
Kudos: 131





	pynk (as we all go insane)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [lagunasnudebeach](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lagunasnudebeach/gifts), [JeremyBearimy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JeremyBearimy/gifts).



> queen @JeremyBearimy was sad at the lack of fics where Jen/Judy take care of one another and then asked for "basically judy taking care of jen after the accident and giving her a bath or something"
> 
> that turned into.... this
> 
> bye
> 
> (also all of the thanks to @everydaybicon for beta'ing this and being such an amazing support!!! 10/10 would die for you)

_Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck_ Jen thinks continuously on loop as she listens to the tub fill in the bathroom. 

It’s been nearly a week since the accident and Jen _really_ fucking needs a shower. Except whoever fucking hit them decided to fuck up her back further and she’s hardly been able to move ever since—let alone stand long enough to shower.

(Or have her limbs move properly enough for a shower. Having to lift her arms high enough and long enough to wash her hair? Yeah, that’s not happening. And she needs it—there’s definitely still some dried blood from the accident that washcloths just simply couldn’t get.) 

So now she’s here on her (their) bed, waiting for the bath to fill because she can at least lay down for a bath.

But she can’t get in and out herself, and she still can’t wash her hair even laying down, which brings her to her current problem.

Judy.

The woman who has been all too helpful and gracious since the accident—as well as apologizing a disgusting amount of times for something that wasn’t her fucking fault—and who has oh so helpfully volunteered to help Jen with her first bath because “it’s okay Jen I’ve had to help the staff at the retirement home before, there’s nothing to be ashamed of!”

And Jen knows she’s right, knows that Judy will be beyond respectful and nice and avert her eyes as much as possible and make her feel like it’s okay to be an invalid that needs help fucking _bathing_ but that’s where the issue really lies. 

Jen doesn’t _want_ Judy to be respectful.

She _wants_ her to look.

Wants Judy to keep flirting with her the way she used to; before Steve, before the accident. 

( _What are you wearing?_

_Mmmmm, slower.)_

_(I like the big butts?_

_You like the big butts?)_

The joking flirtations that Judy has always thrown at her, never seeming serious. The ones that have made Jen’s heart flutter like some monster butterfly so she has to pretend that she hates it, that she isn’t interested, because of course Judy can’t be serious.

Even after Michelle, even after the confirmation that Judy _could_ like her in that way, has an interest in women, obviously she would never be interested in Jen herself.

But fuck if Jen doesn’t feel like every part of her is on fire whenever Judy touches her and helps her move around the house and get settled in her bed; doesn’t melt like butter every time Judy looks into her eyes and asks her if she’s okay, says she’s so thankful to Jen for letting her stay.

As if Jen ever had any choice in the matter—in letting Judy stay.

Jen was doomed from the first fucking moment.

( _Maybe we can not-sleep together._ )

But she could never deserve Judy. So now they’re here, co-owning a house, co-parenting Jen’s kids, and sleeping together every night in a completely platonic, best friend way. Which is fine, it’s great, but Judy’s about to see Jen naked, and it’s not in the sexy way that Jen has always pictured, always in the cover of night when the feelings can be explained away in the morning. 

“You ready?” Judy’s voice interrupts her internal monologue of panic and Jen looks up to see her standing in the doorway to the bathroom, looking all too attractive and tempting in her usual nighttime kimono. 

_Fuck_.

“Yip.” Jen clips out, trying to be the picture of casual and totally okay. She swings her legs sideways onto the floor, letting out a slight groan at the movement before Judy’s right beside her, her arm around Jen’s back. 

“I got you.”

And Jen’s body is burning from both the physical contact and the fact that it feels like her spine might tear its way out of her fucking back at the movement but it’s fine, everything is fine. They walk slowly to the bathroom together and Jen feels like she might pass out once they cross the threshold and she sees the tub before her in all its glory.

“Are you okay?” 

She looks to the side and sees Judy watching her, eyes wide with worry. She realizes her body is trembling so slightly that Judy probably wouldn’t have even noticed if their bodies weren’t pressed so fucking close together.

“Yeah I- yeah.” Jen forces a nod, grits a smile. 

“We can figure something else out, Jen, I don’t want you to be uncomfortable-”

“It’s fine,” Jen interrupts her. “I mean- I- I am. But you know, no time like the present for your best friend to see you naked, am I right?” She tries to joke. Judy’s just looking at her sympathetically and Jen can’t take that, can’t take anything that feels like pity so she tries for serious, takes a deep breath and looks into Judy’s eyes: “I’ll be fine.”

Judy nods, brings one hand up to Jen’s shoulder and then strokes it down her arm lightly, igniting the flames again. 

“Okay so, how do you wanna do this?”

Jen looks to the other woman quizzically. 

“I mean, do you want help undressing or do you want to try and get in the tub by yourself and then I can just help wash your hair? Or do you need me for support? Do you want me to close my eyes? Because I think I could figure it out-”

“Judy,” Jen interrupts again. 

“Sorry,” she says quickly. 

Jen swallows hard. “It’s okay. I think… well I’ll probably need your help getting in. And you don’t need to shut your eyes. It’s… you can look.”

 _Please look_.

She takes a deep breath and starts to pull down the sweatpants she’s been practically living in since she got home before reaching to the bottom of the ratty t-shirt she’s also been living in and taking it off as quickly as possible, clearly exposing her lack of bra. She scrunches her eyes shut as the shirt comes over her head and keeps them shut for a moment, afraid to look at Judy seeing her chest for the first time, tries not to think about the fact that Judy is the first person to even really see her chest besides all of her doctors post surgery.

(Ted glanced quickly a few times, but wouldn’t ever look, would just look away with a scorned expression.)

“Jen,” she hears softly. 

She opens her eyes to see Judy looking at her with a gentle smile, eyes shining slightly. Judy reaches out to cup her face with one hand and Jen feels herself lean into it.

“You’re beautiful,” Judy says. It’s simple, matter of fact, like Judy’s leaving no room for argument and Jen feels something in her chest break wide open at the words—not knowing that’s what she needed until she had it.

“Thank you.” She blinks back tears, not wanting this to turn into some fucking cry fest. She hesitates then before moving her hands to the waistband of her underwear and quickly pulling those down too before walking to the edge of the tub and looking back at Judy—whose face looks a bit flushed?

Judy clears her throat and then moves to Jen’s side, sliding one arm around Jen’s back and using her other hand to grab Jen’s arm, helping to support her and keep her balanced as she slowly lowers herself into the water.

“ _Ugghhhh_ ,” Jen lets out a slightly pornographic moan at the feel of the steaming water surrounding her aching body. “That feels so fucking good.”

It sounds like Judy makes a choked noise beside her, but when Jen whips her head up to look, the other woman has stood up with her back to Jen and is grabbing her shampoo and conditioner from the shower. Jen takes the opportunity to dip her head beneath the water, getting her hair wet in preparation as Judy kneels back beside the tub near Jen’s head.

“Ready?”

“God yes, my hair is so fucking gross, I don’t even want to know what’s going to come out of it. Please don't tell me how much blood is still there.”

She shifts forward a bit so that she can bend her head slightly backwards for Judy’s hands. Judy’s hands, which are now working shampoo through her hair in a way that feels… sexy? Jen has never been one to think that she could be turned on by mundane things but _fuck_ Judy’s fingers scraping across her scalp has her beginning to throb. She can’t help another light moan from escaping her at the sensation and she feels Judy’s fingers grip her hair tightly for a second before releasing.

“Okay, I don't know how you want to rinse?” 

Is her voice slightly shaky? There’s no way she can be affected by this like Jen is… unless—

“Jen?”

She shakes her head lightly to clear her thoughts. “Um… I can just duck my head under the water if that works?” 

“Sure.” Judy’s voice sounds suspiciously light. 

Jen tips her head back as far as she can, slowly sinking until all of her hair is submerged but her face is still in the air so she can breathe. She feels Judy’s fingers working through the hair to get the shampoo out and then a light tap on her shoulder to signify that she’s done. Jen lifts herself up again and feels Judy’s hands immediately come back to her hair with the conditioner and they repeat the process in silence as Jen is forced to listen to her heart beat overtime under the water. 

As she comes up the second time once the conditioner is rinsed she finally chances another look at Judy, who’s currently staring at some point behind Jen’s head. 

“Jude?” 

The other woman’s eyes snap to hers and Jen feels a surge of heat rocket to her core as she notices how dilated Judy’s pupils are; how a blush has spread from the cheeks down to her chest which is heaving oh so slightly. 

“Do you-“ Judy clears her throat. “Do you need help… washing yourself?”

Jen feels her own cheeks start to flame. “No I think- I think I'm fine, if you could just get me the washcloth and soap?” 

Judy nods quickly, practically scrambles off the floor back to the shower to grab Jen’s washcloth and a bar of soap before bringing it back to her. Jen sees Judy’s eyes roving down her body under the water as she stands there, her tongue absentmindedly darting out to lick her lips. 

“I’ll just- I can wait out there until you need help getting out.” Judy gestures to the bedroom.

Jen observes her for another moment and thinks about the signs that maybe just _maybe_ Judy is feeling this too, before taking a deep breath and spitting out her next words: “Or you could stay.” She locks eyes with Judy. “If you want.” 

Judy audibly swallows and nods her head. 

“Okay.”

She hesitates before moving forward and dropping down next to the tub again, resting on her knees with her hands clenched on top of her thighs. Jen looks at her for a moment before shutting her eyes to steel herself—she opens them, then starts lathering the washcloth with soap like everything is completely normal. She starts with the washcloth on her arms, moving it up slowly to her shoulders, pauses, and then moves it down to one breast, circling it around before moving down her stomach briefly and then back up to the other breast.

Judy’s breath hitches slightly beside her but Jen can’t look at her, is practically trembling already at drawing attention to this part of herself, about the part of herself she never wants to look at but wants _Judy_ to look at right now. 

She arches her back, just a bit (telling herself it’s just because it eases the ache for a minute, not to thrust her chest out of the water more) and then moves the cloth back down her stomach. Another pause; she decides to lean forward and start with her legs now, moving oh-so-slowly up one, then the other. Her heart is pounding in her chest, thundering in her ears, so loud she’s not sure how she can even hear Judy but she can, hears a sound that definitely sounds like a whimper. And it’s that sound that she takes as encouragement, that she’s made the right choice in asking Judy to stay, so she spreads her legs apart, just a bit, just enough for Judy to notice the action as intentional, before bringing the cloth (and her fingers) to her center. 

And she can’t help the slight cry she lets out at the contact, the tension of the moment having affected her more than she even realized until presented with the evidence of her own wetness. 

“ _Fuck_ , yes,” she hears murmured beside her and she looks, sees Judy staring at her fingers reverently before meeting her gaze, pupils blown and face flushed all the way down to the opening of her robe.

(Jen wants to see how far down that pretty blush goes.)

She keeps her eyes on Judy as she sets the washcloth in the water and slowly brings her fingers back to herself—Judy’s eyes following all the while—swirling two around her entrance as Judy watches. She brings them up to her clit making her hips jump at the contact and Judy lets out a moan under her breath, drags her bottom lip between her teeth. And that’s the last straw for Jen—she can’t take it anymore, she thinks they’ve waited long enough.

“Judy,” she practically gasps. “Kiss me.”

At the words the other woman surges forward up on her knees like that was the permission she’s been waiting for, catching Jen’s lips desperately between her own, threading one hand through Jen’s hair and pulling, trailing the other hand down to her shoulder, then further, glancing along her breast. The kiss is hard, messy, more tongue than lips, and Jen has never felt more alive in her life. It’s like her body is a livewire and Judy has set her alight. 

“ _God_ Jen,” Judy pants into her mouth. “I’ve wanted this for so long. I’ve wanted _you_ for so long.”

Jen breaks their lips apart (immediately feeling the loss) and takes in the sight of Judy before her already looking debauched. There’s discussions to be had, confessions to make, but for now… they have other things to do.

“So take me,” Jen finally says. She turns her body and holds her arms out to Judy to help her up out of the tub. Judy grabs the towel from the counter and wraps it around Jen, bending to kiss her neck, moving down to her collarbone then down further, sucking a mark into the top of a breast and tracing one of the scars with an affection so soft for this moment that Jen feels her eyes begin to water again. 

“You’re so fucking gorgeous,” Judy breaths out between kisses. 

They stumble into the bedroom with their lips attached to one another, not willing to break the contact in order to see their journey—they know where the destination is. The back of Jen’s legs hit the side of the bed and she sits; Judy immediately takes the opportunity to straddle her lap, the movement opening the bottom of her robe and making Jen immediately aware that Judy is _not_ wearing anything underneath. 

“Oh my God.” She moans low at the feel of the other woman’s wetness against her stomach as Judy slowly thrusts on her, can’t believe that she’s had this effect on the other woman. “Judy, I need to- I need you-”

Judy starts pushing her back up the bed so she’s resting against the pillows. “Don’t want you to strain your back.” She winks at Jen before beginning the journey down Jen’s body with her mouth; she spends an inordinate amount of time at Jen’s breasts, seeming to listen to the sounds Jen is making and the reactions her body has to different movements, different pressures. 

And as she’s focused on Judy’s mouth at her chest, she’s taken by surprise at the feel of a finger suddenly at her entrance, spreading her apart lightly.

“ _Fuck_ , Jen, you’re soaked,” Judy moans against her chest. 

“Just- for you,” Jen stutters out, not sounding nearly as confident as she’d like to.

(But she can’t remember the last time she’s felt this way—the last time she’s _wanted_ so bad, and felt wanted in return. Her body feels brand new and Judy’s the one reading the instructions, learning her perfectly.)

Another finger adds the first, moving in a wide circle and avoiding where Jen needs her most. Her fingers move down, shallowly entering Jen before pulling back out. Judy repeats the process over and over as her mouth moves down Jen’s torso; tongue around her stomach, kisses placed on the scars around her hips, a mark bitten as she quickly moves to the inside of Jen’s thigh.

It feels like she’s everywhere and Jen’s body is a rocket ready to take-off. 

And then Judy’s mouth is on her, tongue sweeping through her folds and making its way up to her clit. 

Jen cries out before she can stop herself—she can’t wake the boys, _definitely_ can’t explain this to them—but Jesus Christ she needs to have Judy’s tongue on her at all times. 

She’s flicking her tongue over Jen’s clit as she suddenly enters Jen with two fingers, filling her so perfectly Jen thinks she might actually be seeing stars. She’s never felt this good during sex, never thought it more than just a chore to be done within her marriage, with old boyfriends. But with Judy… she never wants this experience to end. She’s meeting Judy’s thrusts with her hips, squeezing Judy’s head with her thighs so she won’t take away that perfect fucking tongue. 

She flings her hand out searching for something to hold on to, to anchor herself, and Judy takes it in her free hand and squeezes once before Jen feels her wrap her teeth lightly around her clit and pull ever so slightly.

And it’s that movement that does it—that sends Jen flying to peaks of pleasure that she never even thought possible. She’s pretty sure she leaves her body, is somewhere in the night sky looking down at this experience, until some hours (seconds) later she comes back to herself and feels her body shaking uncontrollably with the aftershocks. 

Jen lays there, breath shuddering, as Judy kisses her way back up her body and captures Jen’s lips in a filthy kiss, letting Jen taste herself on her tongue and feel the wetness of Judy’s cheeks against her own. 

“Jesus, Jude,” Jen finally says. 

Judy lets out a peal of laughter and wraps an arm around Jen’s waist, burying her face in Jen’s neck. “That good, huh?”

“Just give me a minute and I can return the favor.”

“Jen, no, it’s fine! Your back-”

“There are ways to do this without hurting my back, Jude.” She reaches up to the ties of Judy’s kimono and pulls at them, finally exposing the other woman’s body and _fuck_ is it a beautiful body. Judy slides her arms out and throws it somewhere behind her, clearly comfortable sitting atop Jen in her nudity, but seemingly still serious about her statement. 

So of course Jen puts her hands on Judy’s hips and lightly tugs, signalling her to move upward.

“No, I don’t want to hurt you-”

“Jesus Christ Judy just sit on my fucking face!” Jen’s face flames at the words but she can’t take them back—doesn’t _want_ to take them back. Because Judy sitting on her face is definitely one of those things that she’s thought about at night and then pretends to forget in the morning. So yeah… Judy needs to start moving now. 

She tugs harder at the other woman’s hips, raising her eyebrows in almost a challenge.

Judy looks at her, eyes wide and mouth open, before she surges down to kiss Jen— _hard_ —and then quickly shifts up Jen’s body, her center finally hovering over Jen’s face, showing her exactly how wet she's gotten. She lets out a harsh breath at the sight and feels Judy’s full body tremble at the sensation.

Jen puts her hands on either side of Judy’s hips and guides her down, down until she reaches her waiting tongue. She lets out an inadvertent moan at the taste, knowing that Judy has just become her favorite meal. 

(She had never even thought about another woman like this, never until Judy—had never even thought of oral as much of a _thing_ before now, just something that men would do for a few minutes until moving to the main event but with Judy? God, she could keep her face in Judy’s cunt all day.)

She doesn’t even know what she’s doing, just moving on pure instinct as she runs her tongue up the length of Judy, circling her clit briefly before moving back down to her entrance and thrusting her tongue inside as far as she could. 

(Judy’s body jerks above her at the sensation, so Jen thinks she’s doing something right.)

She repeats the motions, thrusting her tongue steadily and Judy starts rocking her hips with the motion, thighs trembling lightly on either side of Jen’s face. Jen can feel the sweat beginning to build between them, feels smothered in Judy’s heat in the best way possible. She doesn’t want to let go of Judy—wants to keep her steady—but she wants to do _more,_ make this even better, so she lets go of Judy’s hip with one hand and reaches in between their bodies, quickly finding Judy’s clit with her thumb. She rubs it with quick, hard circles and feels Judy’s body start to jerk above her, clearly beyond her control. 

“ _Fuck_ , Jen. _God_ just like that.” Judy’s voice is breathy, deeper than Jen has ever heard it and she feels herself clench again at the sound. But this is about Judy, about making her feel as good as she made Jen feel, so she keeps up the motions while her tongue thrusts in and out as fast as she can make it.

(Is it always this tiring for your jaw though? She supposes it’s worth it, regardless.)

And honestly—far too soon for Jen’s liking—Judy’s letting out a high pitched keen, body tensing fully above Jen as she bows backward slightly and gives her a God’s-gift view of those tight abs and perfect breasts. Jen helps to work her through it, waiting until Judy starts breathing again before she licks her lightly one more time (reveling in the shudder it brings from Judy’s body) and helping to guide her shaking limbs back down beside her. 

Judy resumes her place earlier with her head tucked into Jen’s neck, only this time her breath is coming out in harsh pants and her legs twitch listlessly against Jen’s own. 

“Jen… what the _fuck_ ,” she finally chokes out. 

“That good, huh?” Jen echoes her words from earlier, earning a weak pinch to her side. She lets out a snort of laughter that falls into giggles, the high from the experience making her feel blissed out and weightless.

She doesn’t think she’s ever been this happy in her life. 

She doesn’t think she’s ever been this _comfortable_ in her life. So really, there’s no reason to hold back anymore.

“Hey Judy?”

“Mmm,” she gets a grunt in response.

“I love you, you know that?”

She feels a huff of laughter against her throat.

“Duh. I love you too. Now shut up and let me get ready for round 2.”

**Author's Note:**

> thoughts? 👁👄👁


End file.
